Val Selby [00:00:06]:
Hey, this is Val Selby and after over 20 years online, I can track where my mindset has blocked me. If procrastination, impostor syndrome and a lack of focus have been blocking your biz, then Val Full Volume is here to help you see choices you are making. Get ready to use your expertise to collaborate like a pro as you create the business of your dreams. Now is the time to make changes and live your best life. Let's get to it!   

Val Selby [00:00:36]:
Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. This is Val from Val Full Volume. And how are you doing right now in life of this? Like, how are you feeling? What's going on? How long is your to do list? How many to do lists do you have? How many Asana boards? How many Trello boards? How many blah blah? Okay. I'm not here to, like, totally stress you out here. I promise. I promise. Today, I really want to, I guess, I'm usually here talking to myself, not because I'm recording by myself. I don't mean it by that.

Val Selby [00:01:21]:
I mean, if you're a client or a member, most times when I am helping, guiding, coaching, I am typically, like, you'll see me working it through because I'm giving suggestions or giving ideas, and my brain is going, oh, girl, how long has it been since you did that? I know because everything's about me, but it's for real. It's for real. I mean, every time I'm coaching or talking with somebody, there's always a self reflection going on. Okay. I'm saying this out loud to them on, hey, maybe try this and I'm going, oh goodness. How long has it been since you've done that? How long has it been since you've worked on this part? So I'm somebody that I'm guess more guide. I do yeah. Coach, whatever.

Val Selby [00:02:14]:
Okay. We're not even going there. But my point is that as I'm talking and going through that stuff, it is typically myself going through, oh, are you doing this anymore? Didn't this work before? Why aren't we doing this? How can we get this? How can we get this habit back in of doing it? And this is why my 2024 phrase really popped up and I felt it of back to basics. Now here we are. Let's see. End of March. And definitely I've been working to get back to basics, but goodness knows. I mean, I'm in the middle of a full rebrand, getting hyper focused on what the focus is.

Val Selby [00:03:09]:
That'll get me back to basics. But as working through all of it, it's like, here, here, here, here. We gotta talk about this. We gotta talk about that and all of that. So I know I'm coming back to basics. And basics for me may not be the basics for you because the beautiful thing about running your business is you get to do this shit the way that works for you. Not the way that's working for somebody else. You will never make the same amount of money in exactly the same way as somebody else.

Val Selby [00:03:47]:
It's impossible. It's absolutely impossible because you bring your brain into it, you bring your experiences into it. It's always going to be a learning experience of how do you take the best parts of things from other people, from other coaches, from other mentors, and mold into what's going to work for you. And believe me, I know that's part of the frustration. It's like, can't digest, get a road map and follow it exactly and it will 100% guaranteed work? No. Because this is business. And business means trial and error. And it really does mean the error part.

Val Selby [00:04:31]:
We have to test things to find out what will work. What is going to be that thing that really takes off? What is it going to be? And I know for me right now, maybe this will be for you as well, I need to go back to basics. And there's so many ways that I feel that I need to go back to basics. For one, how many times have you heard signature program? You need a signature program. Oh my god. You need a high dollar, high end signature program. That's all you need because then you're just gonna push that. You're gonna push that $2,000 product, $3,000 product, $4,000 product.

Val Selby [00:05:15]:
That's all you're going to push. You're always going to be pushing that. And my brain is just like, okay. Okay. Okay. That was last year. Right? I'm like, alright. Alright.

Val Selby [00:05:25]:
I will do this. What in the world am I gonna create? Oh my god. Okay. A $3,000, $4,000 product. What in the world? How is that gonna happen? And then I started finding other people that were talking and feeling that same thing were coaches and mentors that I was having come into my sphere, and they're talking about all of this, like, anxiety about having to have this high end, high dollar signature product or were failures is what some of these people are pretty much saying, will never make it. And talking to them and listening to them, I, like, all of a sudden, I'm just like, I don't have to have that because I don't know what that would be. And I don't want to sell it. I don't wanna be selling ginormous workshops.

Val Selby [00:06:20]:
You know why I don't want to be selling ginormous, all inclusive workshops? Because I don't personally want to take giant all inclusive workshops. I don't wanna sit there and look at module module module module, 14 modules, very in-depth, excellent information. Potentially, if I followed it, who knows what would happen in with my business. But that is like work. It feels like work to sit there for hours and hours and hours and not know what you're gonna get out of it at the end, my brain just shuts off. And I've signed up for some really great workshops. And I open it up, and as soon as I open it up and see how much information is in there, my brain shuts down. My brain just goes, you wasted your money because there's just no way in hell we have time to do all this.

Val Selby [00:07:27]:
And I know that's a limiting belief because if I really wanted to, I would sit down and I would map out the time to do it. But I'm also human, and I want things yesterday. So when I look at it and I map it out, it's just like, okay. I can't. I know myself and I won't sit down and, like, go through it in a whole weekend. And if I do, how much of that information am I going to retain? Let's be real. How much I like to go through a workshop and implement as I'm going. And I don't feel like I can deliver quick, actionable implementation in a giant workshop. Right?

Val Selby [00:08:04]:
So for me, that's like part of what I want to do and going back to basics. It's like, okay, this is how my brain reacts, which means that there's others of you, maybe you, that your brain's gonna react the same way. And that's okay. It's when we pretend that it's not reacting that way, and we're still trying to force it to do things that it's ridiculous. But if we realize that, hey, this is just the way it is and why am I trying to make myself do something that I don't really wanna do? And why am I feeling like I have to recreate that? When I mean, gosh. I could put it all together and then be just like, oh my god. I don't wanna even market that. So you spend months creating a signature program, and all of a sudden you're just like, I don't even wanna market this anymore.

Val Selby [00:08:58]:
I'm so over it. And I've seen that happen. I've seen that happen a lot. A lot. And especially if you've taken 6 months to create something, your view of so much stuff might have changed by then. Right? You might not even want to be in that niche anymore. And I'm not saying this because you're wishy washy. I'm not saying this because you're not gonna be focused.

Val Selby [00:09:28]:
I'm just saying that she's a 6 months in a life. There's a lot of stuff going on in our lives and business during that time, and you never know what could have happened in that time that you've learned that you're just like, yeah. I just created that. Yeah. It's really, really good, but not feeling it. So for me, I want to be creating smaller, quick, actionable workshops. For me, that is back to basics. It's back to basics for me to put it together because lord knows I have a team of people that I could be outsourcing so much to.

Val Selby [00:10:11]:
And I even look at this whole signature thing, and I don't even wanna sit down and, like, figure out who's gotta do what and what I want them to do. Even that feels like, ugh, work. Versus putting together quick, actionable workshops. Like I said, for me, that feels back to basics. Then there's the other back to basics I'm looking at. Marketing. Marketing. I'm really paying attention.

Val Selby [00:10:40]:
How do you feel you have to market? How are you feeling? You're getting that push of, oh my god. I've gotta go and get on Instagram. Oh my god. I have to go do reels. Oh my god. I have to do this on Facebook. Oh my god. I need to TikTok.

Val Selby [00:10:55]:
How are you feeling about all of that? Can you relax your shoulders? Can you relax them? I know. I just look at it and I was replying back to Angie Jordan. She's in the podcast world, and, I met up with her and had a session to talk about podcasting and marketing and all of that. And so I've emailed back and forth with her on a couple of her newsletters when they really resonate with me. And by the way, I highly recommend doing that. That's actually my number one way of collaborating and recommending you collaborate and find new collaborations. It's answering emails, marketing emails when they ask you a question, and you feel compelled to answer, do it. Do it.

Val Selby [00:11:37]:
Make that connection. Anyway, so I was emailing back to her because she had mentioned in there, like, the whole rebel and tell her to do something and she wants to do the exact opposite. And I'm like, oh, lady. This is exactly why I booked that session with you and knew that it was gonna be an amazing session was because I knew that you had the same vibe as I do. It could be the potentially best thing ever. And if I thought of it on my own or was led nicely into it on my own, I would have been a hell yeah, blown that up, gotta do it, love it. But if you tell me that this is how I have to do it, I have to do this thing. My brain instantly goes fuck off and I will not do it.

Val Selby [00:12:29]:
Now this does not work for dishes, cleaning the house, any of that stuff. Not talking about that kind of stuff. Don't we wish? Don't we wish my husband could just say, oh my god. You had better never clean this house. And then all of a sudden, I was just like, flip switch. Yeah. We're cleaning the house. Yeah.

Val Selby [00:12:47]:
It doesn't work that way. Damn it. Can you tell how much I love to clean the house? But for a lot of other things, if you tell me that that's the only way that it's gonna get done, if I have to do it that way, I will absolutely block that message and want to do the opposite. And like I started out saying, it could potentially be something that I could have heard in a different way and absolutely embraced it and absolutely loved it and rocked it. I could know that this is potentially one of the things that I should be doing that I could do and add in, and it would be awesome. But do not tell me that I have to. Do not tell me it's the only way. I mean, like full mental shutdown does not make sense.

Val Selby [00:13:45]:
It does not make sense. And I've been that way for so many decades and I'm just aware of it. And that's okay. That's okay. Because sometimes I'll come around, but sometimes I won't. Sometimes sometimes that block sits in there for quite a long time. Oh, well, I can't ever do that. Screw you.

Val Selby [00:14:04]:
I won't do it some other way, the hard way, whatever. And I don't even have anything specific right now in mind. But it's just so crazy how my brain just instantly goes, don't tell me what to do. Just, like, really, really instant, like, whatever. It does not make any sense whatsoever. So I'm paying attention to that, and I'm paying attention to that because I'm wondering now how many different things in the past before I was really aware that I did that, that I shut down and, like, cross off my list of never ever do that and not even really knowing why. Not even, not even, not really, no. Absolutely not knowing why.

Val Selby [00:15:00]:
Like, if somebody had told me something and I had shut down, I have no idea that that was even a thing. So I'm looking at that and different ways to market. I'm following different people. I've signed up for some different memberships, like, I'm on a Patron membership now, and I'm looking at it. And I'm really just paying attention to different ways to connect with community. So there's the Patron or Patreon. I don't know how to say it. I say Patron because I don't even drink tequila because tequila hates me.

Val Selby [00:15:30]:
But I say Patron, so I think it's Patreon. I'm looking at that. How does that run? How is that working? I'm looking at YouTube. I'm definitely, definitely, definitely looking into YouTube and and how can I work with that? I have had so many people recommend LinkedIn for me and for making better connections and collaborations. But anytime that I talk to people, they didn't have anything, I guess, specific enough of, hey, try this, or hey, try that. It was mostly, you really should be on there. Well, shit. I don't need another place to be on.

Val Selby [00:16:12]:
I'm on places. I've had my LinkedIn account, I think, since it began. I mean, it's created with my first Gmail account that is like I haven't owned a little scrapbook shop in 20 years maybe. It's on my very first Gmail account. And I'm like, okay, well, I'm gonna be open to this and I'm gonna hear what other people have to say because I don't wanna just be told, hey, you should be on here. You'll find your people. No, no, just being on something doesn't make me find my people. Having an idea of how to use a platform in a more positive way, that's not gonna suck all of my will to survive.

Val Selby [00:16:59]:
That's what I want. So I had a group coaching session and we were talking about it on there and the LinkedIn came in. And actually I had two back to back group coaching and we talked about the same thing. And as soon as that happened, I went, oh, okay. I am seeing how I could more easily keep it simple. Go into LinkedIn and start making connections. I'm like, okay. Now I see it because people were talking about what they were doing versus you just need to be there.

Val Selby [00:17:29]:
That's where your people are. So I'm looking at that because I'm pretty sure that was a block of, you know, hey, shut up and stop telling me that I need to be there. Stop it. Stop it. That's I'm anti that. Anti that. So now that I'm, like, working with people and they're telling me how they're using it and even showing we're doing screen sharing and they walked me through simple steps and the simple ways that they're using it, which is beautiful.

Val Selby [00:17:56]:
Right? Thank you. Give me your simple ways that you are using it. Especially when not competition for you. We're not competition for each other. We're totally gonna be writing different part of posts and articles and stuff on there. So I'm so thankful that I keep running into others that want to do things more simply as well. And that are doing things, I wanna say out of the norm, but it's out of my norm. It's another part of this uncoaching that I'm continually doing of, well, this is what we do.

Val Selby [00:18:30]:
123xycabc. Then you'll have a business. No. No. No. I will not. As soon as I dumped all of that garbage is when I started having a business because we have to do things our way. So how can you keep your business simple? How can you look at what is not simple for you right now? Like, what is overloading you? Are you in that similar mindset where you are feeling like, oh my god.

Val Selby [00:19:02]:
I have to have a signature product. Oh my god. I have to have 12,000 products. Oh my god. My Etsy shop will be nothing unless there's a hundred products in there. Are you feeling that? Because I know when I feel that, I go and watch Netflix. I know when my clients are doing that to themselves, they end up taking 4 days off. Not doing a damn thing because now they're just like, oh my God.

Val Selby [00:19:32]:
There's so much I have to do it. And why am I gonna even bother? Because there's no way in hell I'm doing all of this in a day because there's not. You're not doing a hundred Etsy listings in a day. It's not gonna happen. And I'm not sorry to tell you that. It's just not. We've set unrealistic expectations of ourselves. So keeping it basic is also about those expectations.

Val Selby [00:19:55]:
Like, what are we honestly going to do and honestly commit to doing? What deadlines are we gonna set that we're gonna stick to? Because nobody else gives a crap about your deadlines except for you. They don't wanna hear your excuses because they don't care. They got their own deadlines. They don't care. Deadlines only matter to you. So do they matter? They matter. Keep it basic. Keep it simple.

Val Selby [00:20:22]:
How can you look at your list and go, okay, I've moved this from last week, from the week before, and why? What's going on? Why am I not doing it? Really important to take a look at that for your to do list of what keeps getting moved on, because it's not a priority or you've got a block, but a lot of the time it's like, oh my God, this is gonna take me forever. I don't wanna do it. I don't wanna do it. So take a look. How can you go back to basics in your business? What are basics to you? They're gonna be different. I gave you some ideas of back to basics. It's hard to give you more basics.

Val Selby [00:21:08]:
I mean, for me, it really comes down to what can I do every day? I mean, for me right now, the membership is everything and connecting in the membership. So for me, it's all about how can I talk to one person today about the membership? One person. That's all I'm focusing on. How can I talk to one person? Who is that one person that I'm gonna talk to today about the membership? And that's why I have the 90 day and 1 year goal. It's like, okay, I have my focus of this is the one thing I'm working on for the year, the one focus and everything's gonna lead to that. And that helps me get back to basics because of course, my squirrel brain you know, my squirrel brain? My squirrel brain's like, oh, let's do this. Oh, let's do that. I'm like, nope.

Val Selby [00:21:59]:
Not this year. Not today, Satan. Not today. You are not pulling me in that fun direction or that fun direction. This is my focus and this is what I'm doing this year. And does that idea fit in with this? Does it promote this? Yes? No? Okay. That's easy. That goes in the, in the pile for later.

Val Selby [00:22:23]:
And this one, if this is part of my focus, this one can go in now so we can do that. Okay. Enough. Back to basics. Figure out what that means to you. Where are you blocking yourself? Because maybe you are a rebel, air quotes, and your brain hates to be told what to do. Take a look at it. See why you're blocking it.

Val Selby [00:22:45]:
See if it's something you don't really wanna block. Maybe it's something that'll help your business. So, alright. Thanks for being here. We have so, so much coming up. I am really excited for all of the changes and the hyper focus for Bundle Bash, and it's really hard to wait. Gosh. It's really hard to wait to watch everything unfold.

Val Selby [00:23:13]:
Oh, don't like waiting. I don't - I want it now. Just want a magic button. How come AI can't just switch everything over for me? What's wrong with it? Alright. I'll talk at you next week. Thanks for being here.